Who do I look up to?

When we go to the doctor because we're not feeling well or even just for a general health checkup, they ask us an endless series of questions. They are trying to get to know all about us so when they look at what we want to address they have the better understanding of other issues that can affect the outcome. Same as when we take our dog to the vet, many questions, again we don't just take the dog in they apply a one size fits all solution and you're out the door right? Can you imagine fixing something without knowing more about the thing you are trying to fix?

So, to help ourselves become happier and more fulfilled in everything we do we also need to ask ourselves some questions to really understand who it is we are and what it is that we really want to be. this sounds easier said than done. Sometimes we may block ourselves from getting to the root of who we really are by just not asking the right questions and then listening to what the answers are and understanding what they mean.

Our first project for ourselves is to think about who we admire. This person could be someone from history, or person that you've never met i.e., famous person, a family member or someone you have worked with. Or someone you have said something like, “I wish I was them”.  Think about this over the next week or so see what names keep coming back to you. Give this some time as you go through a week or so with this list making in mind. See what name or names start to cross your mind. The ones that keep coming back are the one(s) we will use for the next step with this exercise.

Here's my list, now what?

The simple next step in this journey is to ask yourself why you admire this person. And then ask yourself again, to that answer another “why?”. You want to get to answer that gives you full understanding of why that trait is important to you, what it means to you and why that is important to you. Cross examine the crap out of yourself, dig like a dog who knows there is something hiding in that dirt and is not stopping until they have it in their sight! Once you have these traits or reasons clear in your mind, say them out loud, hear yourself say them nice and clear. How does it feel when you say them? You may feel a bit anxious or uneasy or feel a sense of excitement starting up. Note how you feel.

The things we find we truly admire in others are most often things we either see in ourselves to some degree or wish we could be better at or have courage to become.  Psychology Today notes, “those qualities are in you, seeking to come out, and that's why you're able to see them so clearly in another person”.  Pretty cool news about you, isn’t it? And further they also emphasize, “We need to take ownership of the positive qualities within us, believe in them, and bring them to the surface. If we leave them unconscious, we will always look to others for guidance in all matters of our life when ultimately, we should be using other people's positive qualities as a means to access our own inner resources”.

Take some time to think about these positive qualities you are now aware of or seeing the importance of in a new way. Our next step in the journey will be highlighting how to use this and continue on your “resc-YOU” makeover!